"Definition of Successful Marriage lies in Understanding & Compromise between two people, which in simple words is defined as Love"

Here I was, aged 20 still in my college days when the need came that I drop the idea of a degree due to family commitments. As a young man, I thought it was my duty to support my family and shoulder my father's responsibility who was working in the Gulf.  Therefore I began the search for a job, discussing the prospects of a job career with my friends.  We friends used to sell old beer bottles collected from our previous drinks for months together to buy one bottle of beer and share among all of us discussing our future plans.

Then came an opportunity to join a huge new upcoming company in my home town, no one had a clue what it was with just a few rumours in the air as usual. Then the day came for the interview. I was panicky with butterflies in my stomach (wonder who came up with this expression of a ticklish feeling after one swallows a whole butterfly) All said and done, here I was, waiting for my turn, biting my nails & gasping for breath and discussing probable questions that the interviewer would shoot with other candidates, but I only ended up confusing myself.

With all tensions prevailing in the waiting room, there I saw a girl sitting in a corner reading a book on 'How to face interviews" as if she was revising just before entering an examination hall.  She seemed to be almost in tears as she awaited her turn for the interview.  Surprisingly, I suddenly felt I was less concerned about my interview but rather worried about the only girl who I felt I knew among the whole lot and I could feel my heart beat all the way through my eyes. Luckily both of us got selected and she called me one day to say "Thank you for support, without your words of motivation I could have never faced the interviewer" - Suddenly I felt I was a born motivator like the great leaders we talk about in our examples.

During our training period of 3 months, everyday I woke up thinking that I would meet her but never discussed about my feelings even with my friends, mom or sister, as I didn't want them to pull my leg.  But deep inside I knew that something was cooking up. (Don't ask me which dish & if you insist it smelt like Chicken Biryani, my favorite). Very soon we often met during our training and liked each others company, discussing a lot of things like future, career, life etc. over lunch. Let me cut short the training story by 3 months, I don't want you to keep reading my article till your hair starts graying and the publisher blocks my email with future articles.

The big day arrived; we were the first batch of employees for the newly opened organisation, so called the Pilot Batch. I was contented that I was called a pilot (even though I am not one) since I had dreams of flying an aircraft in my childhood when my fellow childhood friends said they want to be a bus driver, conductor & other childhood fantasies.  She and I arrived early to the office everyday so that we could converse (don't ask me what; I can't imagine we had so many topics to chat then). Thankfully the mobile carrier we used had the option to choose one number where the calls were absolutely free. (I hope the chief of this mobile service provider doesn't read this - there were times we slept off after talking for hours together and then woke up with a beep from our mobiles realizing that we did not disconnect the call and the batteries had almost died.

Soon our friendship grew and we had a feeling that we were made for each other like a typical Bollywood chocolate love story. Even though we were from two different religions we believed that God has united us. This actually gave us both a wonderful chance to learn more about each others religion and believe me it was a beautiful experience. (We have never till date discussed about conversion and we believe one need to learn to live happily with love & understanding irrespective of cast/religion)

...our different religions worried me, so grasping all my strength I discussed this matter with my mom....

This was the time when I used to own a Royal Enfield, 1972 Model motorbike (Ah.. I repent till date for selling that antique piece). My girlfriend (now my wife) was very jealous of my motorbike since I used to equally love both of them (She misses the motorbike now though). Cruising on the highways with her arms wrapped around my then flat tummy reminded us of Deep Purple's classic song 'Highway Star'. (But we never raced as she refused to let me drive above the speed of 40 Kmph, there were times when kids on their fancy gear bicycles overtook us). Our weekend agenda was to visit both religious places of worship and then take a relaxing ride on the beach, have a nice dinner, go back home and get glued to our mobile phones again.

For the records I was part of a struggling rock band called Black Roses which vanished into thin air when we renamed the band to Ground Zero (Renaming was done for the success of the band keeping in mind superstitious beliefs). For this reason I had a diary with the Lyrics of popular Love Ballads and knew them by heart which she used to ask me to sing over the phone, casual meets, cinema halls, etc… and I loved to sing for her; it was the most romantic & emotional way to express yourself without being questioned about wordings or what you say, but still enjoy it and fall in love. Both of us had similar thought, or in other words like clones (only that we were born as a male and a female). Here is the best part - I suppose we might be the only couple who are married after a 4 year long relationship without proposing to each other. Don't ask me why - was it fear, timidity or just that we felt that telepathy took care of that part.

Then came a time where my present wife's parents had plans to get her married to a Jawan (Soldier), and it was now time for me to pull up my socks and enlighten my parents about our intentions of marriage. However our different religions worried me, so grasping all my strength I discussed this matter with my mom after buying her a new Chudidhar material as bribe and expressed my intention to get married to the girl I loved. There was silence at first and seemed like either the world froze or I had turned deaf. (But I could hear my sister giggle from her room listening to our conversation).

To my shock mom replied – "Son I knew this from the day it all started" like any mom even my mom was a spy who kept track of all my moves. Now I had another situation to face, I had to now take permission from my dad who was in Gulf as per mom's instruction and from my wife's dad who also happened to be in Gulf. I can't explain till date how and what I said to convince both of them. I felt I could now start writing books on sales & marketing when I stepped out of the telephone booth. At last I got the approval from both the dads & my mom for our marriage. I felt as if I just came out of a summit striking a $ Billion deal.

Now that we had the parental approval, next came the question of our child's future even before we got married. Ah… the situation again got tensed with the thoughts of what one would feel/think in our society about inter-religion marriage and about people who were more interested in gossip to kill time.

To my surprise my mom called me one day and asked me if I really wanted to get married, blinking my eyes with I uttered "Yes I do". With no further delay we decided to get married in court for it to be legal. Deep inside we were insecure with the feeling of losing each other which preoccupied us every second till we signed in front of the marriage registrar who asked us questions as if we were being forced to get married (Poor fellow, he was just doing his job sincerely. Who knows how many people he has to repeat the same questions, Maybe even in his dreams he can ask these questions without a fumble). We were now pronounced Husband & Wife by the registrar and congratulated by a few close friends, my sister & of course my Mom, who were all waiting outside the marriage registrar office. We missed both our Dad's & her Mom who was not happy at that time. (Currently everything has been resolved and we are a happy family).

That evening I gave my wife a bouquet of flowers hugging her tenderly and said to her "Darling I know I could have bought you an expensive necklace or bangles, but I wanted to give you something beyond mere value, which will not remain with you forever but the memories of it would remain with you your entire life which you cannot toss away even when you are angry with me…………"  We said "I Love You" to each other and tears rolled down our eyes as we at gazed each other and embarked on our new life together.

Life after Marriage Part II to be contd….