‘God Lift My Heart In Faith Each Day’- Breast Cancer Survivor Smt Surekha Pai Shares Her Life Experiences

‘God Lift My Heart In Faith Each Day’- Breast Cancer Survivor Smt Surekha Pai Shares Her Life Experiences

Note: Smt Surekha Pai, aged 48 of Mangaluru, who was diagnosed with Metastatic Breast Cancer at the age of 42 in February 2016, has been coping with life and keeping herself busy with music/singing to overcome the sorrow and pain, and also keeping full faith in God, shares her life experiences about her journey fighting cancer for the last four years. She had written this article during the Breast Awareness Month in October last year, in order to bring inspiration among others who are also fighting the Cancer Battle!

AN EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW WITH SUREKHA PAI BY TEAM MANGALOREAN WILL FOLLOW THIS ARTICLE SOON

I have always been a happy go lucky person all through my life. Having spent my early part of my life in the high energy and fast-moving city of Mumbai, and then moved to Mangaluru as I found my life partner in the most beautiful town of Karnataka. I must admit, it took some time for me to get used to this change. Like any other Indian family, I got adjusted to the new environment and the arrival of our daughter made my life a little more hectic with new responsibilities. Although I have not undergone any lessons in music, My passion was music and used to sing on any occasion big or small at home or my community while I grew up in Mumbai or for family events.

Life kept moving and I just flowed along with the flow. Somewhere in late 2015, I started feeling some uneasiness. Initially, I felt it might be something routine, possibly less sleep etc. the chores at home never gave me much option to think more on this. The more I tried to ignore, I felt that some new issues cropping up. Started getting mild back pain. Again, my mind forced me to ignore, and under the excuse of the responsibilities of taking care of my daughter and supporting my husband. By the end of January 2016, I reached a stage where the back pain became excruciatingly unbearable. We went to different doctors and did a few tests. Nothing significant was diagnosed.

Around mid-February, finally, I had to be admitted to the hospital as I got to a stage where I couldn’t even get up from the bed. My mother and brother too came down to Mangaluru. Again more tests were conducted. Was told that I have to undergo CT scan and MRI Scan. The undergoing these tests in itself was an experience. Being claustrophobic, I was feeling so very uncomfortable when my body was moved into the MRI machine. I anyways did not have much of a choice. In these three days, not only did I have a stream of different doctors coming over to check the different aspects, and also many of my family members and friends came to meet me. I was wondering what was happening around. Sometimes ignorance is also bliss.

Slowly in the next two days, I was informed by my husband along with his cousin who was also a doctor informed me that I have been diagnosed with breast cancer and that too at stage IV. It was like a huge lightning bolt. My mind went blank for a few seconds and I felt darkness all around me. My husband was completely broken down possibly the first time I saw him in a helpless situation. My daughter was devastated and my mother was no different. I was now trying to find out what it meant. Do I start counting weeks or days or hours? Then I quickly saw my husband getting and gathering himself and informed me that there is a recovery plan that the doctors have come out with consisting of radiation, chemotherapy and the likes. Without any further delays, the medical regime was put in place.

At a period when I should be taking care of my mother, I was now forced to completely depend on her for anything that I wanted to do. My husband whom I used to support in his business is now beside me the whole period. My daughter who used to throw tantrums at anything and everything is now so changed taking responsibilities and owning it up.

Slowly I could feel changes in my body. Hair started falling off at a quick pace. Within a few days, it was a completely different me and my image which was so unlike. Each of the chemotherapy cycle was very different. For about 24 to 36 hours after each session, it used to bring in so much of mood swings within me. I used to feel like a zombie. What made me go through this phase was the positive talks by aunt and uncle who used to visit me daily and spend long hours with me. I used to chant a few hymns (Rama Raksha Sthothra, Vishnu Sahasranama, Hanuman Chalisa ) Also to KOSEN RUFU.The power of Chanting NAM MYOHO RENGE KYO. brings forth the power and faith and one can manifest the power of Buddha and law within one’s life. It has indeed enlightened me. I propagate this law to everyone.

Doctors informed me that the medicines are working and that they were seeing progress. After spending about five weeks in the hospital, I moved to our apartment back in a wheelchair. I was wondering, whether I will have to spend the rest of my life in a wheelchair. The thought itself used to give shivers in my already weak body. My mother used to feed me, time to time-based on the strict diet prescribed by the doctors. Slowly and steadily I started gaining strength. Once the chemotherapy sessions were over the doctor confirmed that the tumour was reduced in size. But due to the delay in diagnosis, the cells had spread to my spine which needed a longer cycle of medication. From complete bed rest slowly I was given permission by my doctor to sit down for some time. It was such a relief to hear that from the doctor. My husband now took some additional risk to take me for a ride. This change was nothing less than ecstasy.

I started taking calls on my phone. Had quite a few of my school and college friends call me with positive messages. Leveraged a few of the social media apps to my advantage. Around this time, I came across one of the apps that kind of tickled me on my passion, singing. I started to use some part of my free time to sing and share it with a few friends Especially my sister Kalpana. They encouraged me further. I got introduced to a bunch of singers from Mangaluru most of them who have not gone through any formal music training. This became one of the turning points for me. I joined their music club which used to meet once a month. I used to look forward to the next meet, by identifying and rehearsing a couple of my songs from my favourite list. With the humongous support from my husband, daughter, mother, close relatives and my music friends I started getting back to my normal life slowly and steadily. Since then I have not seen back. I am blessed. Yes, I Am BLESSED!!

Everything that happens, happens for good! Still, I think I possibly ignored some of the warnings that were coming up. As usual, we give more importance to our family suppressing the needs of ourselves. Without compromising on our responsibilities I believe now that we should give enough time and attention to ourselves. I remember my gynaecologist advising during one of my visits to her about doing a self-test on a periodic basis and yearly health check-up. But like most people, I used to believe that nothing can happen to me as I take utmost care of what I eat and the simple lifestyle we follow. This experience I went through just proved it so horribly wrong. Having had to face it there are a few things that helped me in my journey.

We should not lose hope in life. It is just a bend and not the end of life, can be mended with a confident inner self and strong will power. Find peace in smaller and little things in life that make one’s life simpler. Whenever I felt like giving up after the painful chemotherapy session, my mother who herself was very weak physically and heartbroken used to I still confidence in me by stating multiple times “Surekha, nothing is going to happen to you, You are a fighter.”

Yes, we learn from our failures, or we can learn from others failures. In this topic, I would not mind being an example in you choosing the second option from above. I sincerely request each of you to give utmost importance to your health as only if that is taken care off, we can play the other roles in our family very effectively. As we commemorate October as Breast Cancer awareness month, mark your calendar to do a yearly health checkup and including mammogram based on the frequency as advised by your gynaecologist. It’s time to really believe in the proverb “Prevention Is Better Than Cure”.

I also want to use this opportunity to thank everyone who stood by me in this surprise journey, my family, friends, chant group members, my newly found music group brothers and sisters, all my fellow cancer survivors who inspired me and helped me build my confidence. You all have earned a special place in my heart.

God Bless.