‘What It Feels Like To Be A Mom’- KMC ‘Wow Mom’ Contestants Share Their Thoughts
Mangaluru: Motherhood is the best gift for any woman. A woman takes pride in being a mother and motherhood makes her a complete woman. “What it feels like to be a mother/Mom” is so different for each woman, yet there are commonalities that all thoughts expressed here by a few of the contestants of the just concluded “WOW MOM” contest organized by Kasturba Medical College Hospital, Mangaluru, and almost all other mothers we have known have crossed. What it has been like for these moms has been different at each stage of their lives, and yet the most important things, to them, remain the same, namely, profound and primal love and protectiveness.
For a woman, being a mom means more than having given birth to a child. It’s loving and knowing a soul before you even see it. It’s carrying and caring for a life completely dependent on you for survival. It’s giving air to the lungs that grew within you, and a sight to the eyes that will never see you as anything but mommy. It’s sleepless nights, its nursing scratches and scrapes, it’s being stern and protective. It’s teaching them to talk, to walk and to eventually run. It’s learning to hand your child to a stranger to let them teach what you cannot at times. It’s bracing them for a fall, and dusting them off after they do.
Seen in photo L-R : Wow Mom Runner-Up Ms Monisha D’Souza; Actress Shilpa Shetty Kundra; Ms Nafisa Malik; and Ms Indira Ballal (wife of Dr H S Ballal-Pro Chancellor of MAHE)
Being a mother is a gift that is unimaginable to any woman who does not have a child in their life. It’s a connection that is unmatched and insurmountable in any form or other relationship. It’s a love that grows continually, a love that always wants more and better. And for Moms, it’s like- “It’s a blessing, a gift, a relationship that never ends and a love that never dies. It’s the best thing I have ever become, the greatest love I have ever felt and the best part about being me”. It’s looking through photographs and feeling your heart swell with love and happiness when you see the beauty, the happiness and life in your child’s smile and eyes. It’s confusion, mistakes, uncharted territory and blindfolded guessing. It’s snuggling on the couch watching a movie, braiding hair till your fingers hurt, it’s being woken up early on Saturday morning because they want to crawl in bed and be close to your heart. It’s having the worst day and having them hug you and tell you “mommy I love you”, and needing nothing more.
Team Mangalorean met a few moms, at the launch of ‘Woman & Child Centre’ of KMC at a glittering function held at TMA Pai Convention Centre, which was graced by Kudla’s origin and Bollywood actress Ms Shilpa Shetty Kundra. Out of the 350 plus contestants who took part in the ‘Wow Mom’ contest, ten made it to the finals, out of which two were judged as winners- Ms Nafisa Malik was crowned as ‘Wow Mom’ winner, while the runner-up place was bagged by Ms Monisha D’Souza.
Wow Mom Winner Ms Nafisa Malik with her husband, Shad Malik
Speaking to Team Mangalorean, the winner of “Wow Mom” contest Nafisa Haniyya Khairkhan Malik said, “I’m a Fashion Designer who was working in Amri Fashions, Dubai. My husband, Shad Malik is employed as a Manager at Mumuso. KR, Dubai. I am the daughter of Haneef Khair Khan and Haseena and I feel proud to be born a Mangalorean. Regarding, what it feels like to be a mom- No one can express what it exactly feels like to be a mom. But I feel blessed that Allah is going to bless me with a mini version of myself. Even though my journey of being a mom/pregnancy wasn’t that easy, I certainly feel lucky to be blessed with awesome parents to love and take care of. I believe a mom’s love begins even before the child is born and the joy begins when I first hear the tiny heartbeat and feel the first kick of my baby. As it is my first time being a mom, I was smitten with this beautiful, incredible, vulnerable human being who is half me and half my love, yet a completely new person. This kind of love is completely different from the love I have towards others”.
Wow Mom Runner-Up Ms Monisha D’souza and her family
Here is what ‘Wow Mom’ runner-up 32-year-old Monisha D’Souza had to say- “Born in Mangaluru, I am married to Dane D’Souza, who is a reputed businessman in the City and we are blessed with two lovely children, Vivaan (3 yrs old) and Anaya (1 yr old), while I am expecting the 3rd child. An engineer by profession, I used to work for Infosys Mangaluru, but left the job to be a caring housewife, to my husband and children. I enjoy singing, dancing and playing the piano, and spend time with my family and meeting friends, which is a great idea of a relaxing day”.
“What it feels like to be a mom”- Being a mother has really given me a new meaning and perspective to life. Its an incredible journey right from the time you conceive. The emotions you go through, the tiredness and uneasiness is all worth it at the end. For once your child is born there is this un-explainable abundance of love for them, where you will do anything and everything in your ability to do what’s best for your kids. This journey has been made comfortable and easy for me, only because of the love and support from my dearest husband and both our families who have been with me every step of the way. Our children fill our home with joy and fun and with my mother and mother-in-law being my role models, I’ve slipped into motherhood with ease and happiness ” added Mom Monisha.
Wow Mom Finalist Ms Shruthi D with her husband, Deekshith
‘Wow Mom’contestant Ms Shruthi Deekshith, Mangaluru speaking to Team Mangalorean said, “After my graduation, I have worked with Shipping & Logistic Company and with Plywood sector as an Accountant. On April 5th, 2018, I got married to Deekshith, and I am so blessed to have him in my life and we both are happy that our little munchkin is coming soon in our life to make us more and more happier. I am carrying my first baby in my womb, and its been 8 months now, and I feel my baby is very nearly in full term. This journey has such a wonderful feeling which I can’t express in words. Only a mother feels her upcoming baby’s movement from 5 months itself”
“But in the meantime, I have been getting all the love, care, affection from my husband and family members, and the pampering has increased a lot lately from them. Regarding this Wow Mom contest I am happy that I had participated in it, and got selected as a top 10 finalist. I am really thankful to the Manipal Group/KMC Hospital for conducting this event and giving me a chance to unleash my hidden talents. My baby is the best gift for me and my husband and we are waiting for his/her arrival. I could still be several weeks away from giving birth, but at the moment taking time this month to get ready and I feel happy and proud mom to be” said Shruthi.
Wow Mom contestant Ms Rita Menezes and her family
Yet another contestant of Wow Mom, Ms Rita Menezes said, “After 12th I did my 4 years diploma in fine arts-Bharathanatyam. Then I got married to Dony Menezes in 1999, after which I completed my graduation. (BA). My first ‘Miracle Child’ was born after 13 years of our marriage, and God is so gracious that I conceived after 13 long years of wait. This happened while on our tour to Israel, and on our way we visited river Jordan, during which I felt some changes within me, I felt God’s touch. Later I went to the hotel room and did a pregnancy test, and the result showing positive, it was unbelievable news to us. God blessed us with a boy, so we named him Jordan. After my first child, I stopped all the medication, and once again after 6 1/2 years, I am conceiving my second child. God is so great, and we are really grateful and thankful to the almighty”
“Presently I am working as a teacher for tiny tots in Mount Carmel Central School Maryhill, while my husband Dony Menezes who was working in Dubai Airport for nearly 20 years, came down for good to Mangaluru, and is into real estate business-he is also top Cyclist in Mangaluru, having broken many cycling records. Once I became a mother, that was it: I was smitten with this beautiful, incredible, unbelievably small and vulnerable human being that was a part of you and your partner, and yet was a completely new person unto themselves as well. It doesn’t always happen immediately, I know, but it sure did for me. I WANTED HIM. I’m damn lucky I have had a good stable partner to be his father. It took a while, but we got our beautiful boy. Enter the crush of new parenthood: extreme and overwhelming joy, disbelief, confusion, effort and fatigue – oh my, the fatigue for the first few years” added Rita
She further said, “But then, you are watching this precious beautiful being change, so quickly! It’s as if they change and grow before your very eyes sometimes, you just can’t believe it. You feel such awe, astonishment and pride in them, watching them grow and change into their next stage. It’s always a proud moment to be a mom, no matter what. Once a mom, always a mom. Motherhood is a unique time in your life – you are on the threshold between being a child and a mother. You experience not just the birth of a baby, but your own rebirth as well – of your identity as a woman, rather than a girl. Having a baby makes you grow up quickly. You are no longer free to pursue whatever you want – even if all you want is to sleep through the night. I can’t wait to have my second child, and it was a golden opportunity for an expecting mom to be in the Wow Mom contest, and also amidst the gorgeous actress Shilpa Shetty, who is also a proud mom”.
Deputy Manager (Marketing) at KMC-Ms Swathi Raviraj and family
Then Team Mangalorean spoke to 37-years old Swathi Raviraj, a working mother of two wonderful kids – Sanvi (7.5 yrs) & Ruhan (6 yrs), and employed as Deputy Manager (Marketing) at KMC Hospital Mangaluru with over 12 years’ experience in the field Branding and Communication. She is married to Raviraj, AGM (Operations), also at KMC, Mangaluru. About “What it feels like to be a mom”- Being a Mom is a life-changing period – a delightful roller coaster ride – with all the ups and downs, thrills and laughter. Motherhood is a journey of life where you definitely forget yourself and put the priorities of kids ahead of yourself”.
“My kids give me fresh goals each day, because of them I get to enjoy childhood bliss again, playing games, swinging in the playground, watching animated movies, eating ice creams, enjoying the drops of rain and much more.. through this phase your even understanding your own Mothers life as you were once a child too. As we say, the mother is born long before her baby, i.e, when she is planning to have a baby, when she starts nourishing herself through the 9 months of the baby being in her womb and thereafter till baby grows… there is never an end to this relationship. A mother will always be a mother even after she is not around, her presence will be felt. It is the most beautiful and the genuine relationship in this world ” said Swathi..
Yes, we all heard it what these Wow Moms had to say about being a Mom/Mother. Through the testimonies of these moms and moms to be, we are quite sure that becoming a mother makes you feel joyful, elated, empowered, and invincible. You’ve just pushed another human being out of your body, and you’re unprepared for all the things that come so quickly. While you’re in the hospital, you’ve got plenty of help, but when you go home, it’s all up to you. Becoming a mother expands the parameters of what love looks like to you by opening up a part of your heart that you didn’t know existed. This kind of love is entirely different than the love you have for your parents, spouse, etc.
I end this column with thought-provoking words of a mother of three children, (who wanted to remain anonymous being a single mother having being divorced from an alcoholic and abusive husband), whom Team Mangalorean met after the launching of the ‘Woman & Child Centre’ programme- “Becoming a mother allows you to be able to love from a different part of who you are. Being a new mom can come with feelings of inadequacy because there is a learning curve involved. It’s important to be realistic about the transition to motherhood because the more realistic you are about it, the easier it is to get through those difficult things”.
“Suddenly you have experiences like having to stay awake all night to care for your baby, crying, colic, loss of prior freedoms, lack of help, and other adjustments. Your life is entirely different, and you’re learning how to adapt and figure out everything during a time when you are so tired that you can’t see straight. The important thing to realize is that you’re not alone. All mothers experience the same process, and you will get through it. You don’t have to be perfect, but you do have to understand that it’s okay to make mistakes in motherhood. All mothers make mistakes, and you will too. Just don’t be judgmental with yourself. Being a mother is the most rewarding and most frustrating experience. Kids challenge you, mold you, and in many ways, define you. This relationship, at least in terms of influence, is definitely a two-way street”.
